The Bathtub

Happy New Year to Everyone.  I hope it is the best year ever.  Yada Yada Yada.

The Bathtub

On January First of this year
My bathtub was a mess I fear
It had a different kind of reak
That lingered there for that whole week

I made a mental note to clean it
And at the time I sure did mean it
But for a reason that’s unseen
My dirty bathtub stayed unclean

It stayed like that until the Spring
That time of year when birds all sing
Its dirty state went on and on
While I just shopped on Amazon

I’d had enough of it by June
But got distracted by the Moon
And then I watched Star Trek with Sulu
They have all episodes now on Hulu

Each day when I would take my shower
I smelled the mold’s increasing power
And afterwards, when I was dry
I stared at it and wondered why

The tiles both within and out
Had moldy streaks along their grout
The tub itself had lost its shine
I could not believe it was mine

So why did I have a tub that reaks?
And had being doing so for eighty weeks?
The whole thing started making me crazy
Until I realized I was being lazy

And finally, in late December
On a day which I will always remember
I took a scraper to its walls
Because sometimes in life, duty calls

I spent the day cleaning that tub
I listened to Aqualung as I did scrub
I streamed it online, as I remember
Because I’m an Amazon Prime Member

When I was finished I felt a power
And the next day I used a different shower
So why is that? I’ll tell you why
It’s because the caulking wasn’t dry

But now it is and I’m all set
And after I shower, when the tub is wet
I dry it off, from head to hiney
So it will always be clean and shiny

The Mighty Juggler Vein

Do you know what the Juggler Vein is?  It is located between the dudonym and the Gall Bladder, and somewhere below the brain. In many medical schools in Great Britain, Medical Students have passed down over the years, rhymes that help them pass their exams.  This one is called “The Mighty Juggler Vein.”

The Mighty Juggler Vein

Right next to the Spleen
And way below the brain
It does its job unseen
The Mighty Juggler Vein

So named because it juggles
And distributes the body’s fluids
For Wizards and for Muggles
And even those crazy Druids

The Juggler Vein was discovered in 1853 by James P. Juggler, who interestingly enough did not juggle.  He was, however, a Muggle.   He was also known to jiggle on occasion.

Without the Juggler Vein, the human body would not be able to break down its hemogoblin into carbon and oxygen.  Also, the level of anti-gamogobulins in the blood would increase to unhealthy levels.

Without the Juggler Vein’s amazing fluid-juggling abilities, we would all be in real trouble.

Let’s hear it for The Mighty Juggler Vein!